I have been playing around and experimenting with my art supplies. Watercolors – see that really cute one of the two little girls? Acrylic craft paints, paint pens, gelatos.
Oh my goodness! Gelatos! I very recently got these (half off, people! Wooot!!!), and I love them!!! They are creamy and blend beautifully. The colors are dreamy! They are so much fun to play with!
And then there are my watercolors…
My first time painting as an adult was with watercolor. I fell madly in love with them. But they are a difficult medium to learn and when I tried acrylics – a much easier medium to work with – I traded my watercolors in for the easier to use medium.
For the past six months or so, I have had a yearning to try watercolors again. I hesitated. I resisted. And then I gave in and bought a small set of Koi Watercolors. Mmmmm, such vibrant colors!
But I put them aside again. I had forgotten all I’d learned about watercolor – which, I might add, was about 20 years ago, and was very beginner.
I already feel insecure enough about my artistic abilities so I resisted adding even more insecurity with watercolor.
You see, I really want to be a great watercolor painter. I mean I really, really want it. I want so much to be able to paint the images I see in my head and I am so far from that reality right now.
I'm feeling intimidated and inadequate. Honestly, it feels quite impossible to me.
But, I also know that I will never get to where I want to be unless I practice, practice, practice!
And so, the other day, I just played around with my watercolors. Since I love children’s book illustrations so much and the adorable simple characters capture my heart, I just let myself have fun and try my hand at a couple of my own simple watercolor characters and this is what I painted:
I love them! They are so cute, and they make me feel happy inside. 
Do I have a lot to learn still? Yep, I sure do! But I’ve decided to just have fun along the way. No more pressure! There's already enough pressure in life. I certainly don’t need to invite that into my play time.
I’m off to play some more. It’s Saturday! Go get your play on too!
And a month later... So much has changed.
I have been seriously thinking about changing the name of my business, as I'm going in a bit of a new direction.
I've struggled with this off and on, wondering if I create Christian art, would I be shooting myself in the financial foot. Really honest there!
Afraid that it would turn a lot of people off, and away from my blog - you know, when I eventually actually got the courage to create more art and post it here...
Would I ever be able to get published in all my favorite Stampington magazines? Would they publish a Christian artist? I'd never seen it before, so I was afraid they wouldn't.
I have dreamed these beautiful artsy dreams for so long - for two decades!!! - and I feared there would be a 'limited audience' if I were to create Christian art solely.
I was wrong... In so many ways, I was wrong.
It is my beautiful Jesus that has given me these artsy dreams to begin with.
He knows my every need. He knows everything it will take for me to make my art dreams come true. He knows how much money I need to make so I can financially support myself.
He knows all of it.
And He is still calling me; whispering ever so sweetly in my heart and in my spirit to paint for Him, to blog about my art journey and my walk with Him, to have the courage to show my art on my blog and list it in my very new and very empty Etsy shop.
He knows all that I need. He is my light and my life. He is my everything.
And so I have nothing to fear.
God told me that directly late yesterday afternoon. Sabrina, my son-in-law's sister-in-law (but she is like a niece to me! :) ), texted me and sent me a link to a YouTube video featuring a song called No Longer Slaves by Jonathan David & Melissa Helser. She told me that the Lord brought me to her mind when she was listening to that song that day and she hoped it blessed me.
Wow! It blessed me so much. It is still blessing me. :)
There is no need to fear, for "I'm no longer a slave to fear. I am a child of God."
And one of my favorite verses in the song:
"You split the sea so I could walk right through it. My fears are drowned in perfect love."
And so, I am stepping out in faith and following what God has put in my heart.
